How Was Your Week, Darling?: A Debate, A Biden Smear, a Possible Defection?

The takedowns and hot takes from a week in the life of Ken Darling.

The Missed Opportunities of the 2020 Election

Biden did great tonight. He had a command of policy; he sold his aggressive climate agenda as essential to our survival and as a job-creator. His decency and honesty stood in sharp contrast to the cruel, stupid mendacity of Trump. But, still, I couldn’t help but wonder how joyous it would have been to watch Pete Buttigieg, a gifted rhetorician and true intellectual, spin Trump like a top, destroying him not just rhetorically but morally. We must see this man humiliated and reduced, his lies turned against him in real time, not only as an emotional release but as the first step in healing. The second step will be his prison sentence.

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If You Say It, It’s True!

OMG, Donald Trump’s magical words tonight convinced black people to vote for him like he’s Barack Obama, suburban women to vote for him like he’s their personal savior and protector of their children, and the elderly and small business owners to vote for him like he’s the man who cured Covid and made it perfectly safe to kiss grandma and shop and drink and eat indoors! Either that or he’s a lying sack of shit. We’ll know which is true on Election Day.

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Идиот

If you are dumb enough to think the “Hunter Biden email story” is a thing, you are not only a fool but what the Russians call a “useful idiot” — a fool who can be easily manipulated by propaganda to damage the United States and benefit Russia. You are a willing tool of Putin — a traitor due to your own stupidity and credulity. So turn off Fox, get off social media, listen to American counter-intelligence experts and try to reclaim some self-respect.

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Comrade Trump?

This seemingly-off-the-cuff remark from Trump that he may “have to leave the country” if he loses the election could be the watershed moment of the most corrupt and bizarre presidency in American history. Trump can’t help but announce his corrupt intentions in public; every thought that enters his head must exit his mouth. He’s done it so many times we’ve lost count.

I think it is very possible that during their regular, private phone calls Trump is doing a deal with Putin to seek asylum for himself, Ivanka, Jared and their children. Uday and Qusay and their families may join them or be left behind to take the rap. (Melania and Baron would stay behind on their own accord and play the victim.)

Russia is the only country in the world that would be willing to take this family of thieves, who by January will be just weeks away from facing serious felony charges in New York and elsewhere. For the sheer audacity of it, Putin would stand up to American sanctions and international condemnation and keep the Trumps as his personal playthings, refusing to extradite and parading them on television daily, letting the fat, greasy ex-president, now broke, rant incessantly about the Deep State and the unfairness of it all — from a Kremlin studio built exclusively for that purpose.

To avoid being stopped by the FBI, Trump and his clown-car of capos would fly to Moscow in mid-January — while he is still president — and defect, effective Inauguration Day.

I know this sounds too bizarre to be possible. That is exactly why it could happen.

The Gay Goods is dedicated to engaging with a range of opinions and viewpoints. To share yours, email editor@thegaygoods.com or comment below.

Ken Darling
About Ken Darling More Articles
Raconteur, history buff, entrepreneur, Palm Springs habitué, Connor's best friend. Owner and producer of DreamBoyBondage.com.
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